Blooming Women
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  • Happy Birthday, Blooming Women! One Year Today!
  • Blog—Maniacal Musings—Becky Lyn Rickman, Managing Editor
  • Blog—Jessica's Journey—Jessica VanVactor, Guest Contributor
  • Blog—My Armenia—Carol Rickman's Blog
  • Dealing with miscarriage
  • My Story
  • Circles
  • The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Being Single
  • 5 Stages of divorce recovery
  • The Circus is in Town
  • (You're covered with) The Fingerprints of God
  • Thunder Roared and Love Soared
  • A Period Piece
  • A sneak preview of the Gertie sequel!
  • Six Steps to Cultivate your Femininity in the Business World
  • Chore Zoning or Don't try this at home!
  • The 50 with Meredith Morse—Opera Singer
  • The 50 with Jessica VanVactor
  • Memorizing Joy
  • AT LAST! My interview with Shan White, Life Coach for women in transition
  • Questions and statements we don't care if we never, ever get asked or told again (am I right, girls?)
  • The Date
  • Moonshadow's Spirit
  • Broken Writer + Hypnotherapy = Amazing Trips
  • The "R" Word
  • The 50 with Carol Shepherd Rickman
  • Triumph During Transitions
  • A Kentucky Afternoon
  • Mothers
  • 10 things chemo taught me
  • What if . . .
  • Forgiveness—A poem
  • Mantegories (n. from the Latin; man+categories)
  • Insomnia 101
  • Blooming Bud Interview: Sierra
  • Masterful Mindsets
  • It's in the bag!
  • Important lessons for children: Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can
  • Nursery rhymes, and times, and slimes, and grimes, and crimes
  • Things I learned as a single mom
  • Sadie's Soapbox: Dating
  • The Dress
  • 8 Things That Have Surprised Me About Having a Large Family
  • The gift of longing
  • The Semicolon Project
  • Most embarrassing moments—culinary edition
  • MilitaReality—a brat's perspective
  • About those elusive wisps of thought
  • Being there
  • The Giving Mom
  • How I still haven't learned to keep my smart mouth shut!
  • If you give a mom a cookie . . .
  • Cacti and Geraniums
  • The Three Gardeners
  • Beauty is as beauty does
  • Words for Sabra
  • Arm scratching in Baltimore
  • Pornography didn't kill our love and friendship . . . I did . . . and how we got it back
  • Hardening off our little bloomers
  • The Wonderful, Magical Women of Blooming Television
  • Shake it like a Polaroid picture!
  • 25 Date Nights (that aren't dinner and a movie)
  • Hills Like White Elephants
  • Maryland Beaten Biscuits
  • The night we thought the house was exploding
  • A mysterious case of goosebumps or "What is that on the wall?"
  • Militareality—Real stories of military wives
  • Finding my metal in wood
  • Another blooming bud interview
  • Chariot of Fire
  • Secret gifts of love
  • The best prank I ever pulled was . . .
  • Connie
  • Dating and other hazards
  • Favorite childhood memories
  • When God speaks . . .
  • Zanie gets into another sticky situation
  • No-see-ums: A little useful information
  • I love my kids, but . . .
  • Meg's poem
  • Another blooming bud interview
  • Some of my favorite herbal recipes are . . .
  • I love my cat, but . . .
  • I love all creatures, but . . .
  • The thing all girls and women must see and know . . .
  • The Great Chicken Debacle
  • The Powerful Influence of Brothers
  • How I feel about blooming is . . .
  • Sometimes grandma is up—other times she is simply upside-down
  • Anyone out there as anxious as I am?
  • Some of my funniest childhood memories are . . .
  • You might be addicted to Harry Potter if . . .
  • This month's survey:
  • Another Blooming Bud interview
  • The most valuable life lesson I've learned is . . .
  • The greatest blessing to come out of the most painful thing I ever experienced was . . .
  • The most powerful influence on my life is . . .
  • The thing that could have broken our family, but didn't was . . .
  • The funniest thing that ever happened to me was . . .
  • The time my dad really surprised me was when . . .
  • NEW FEATURE: Interviews with Blooming Buds
  • ANOTHER NEW FEATURE: A survey
  • The most valuable life lesson I've ever learned is . . .
  • My most embarrassing moment was when . . .
  • What really puzzles me is . . .
  • One of the most fun days I ever had was . . .
  • The most scared I've ever been was when . . .
  • The people who have been the biggest influence on me are . . .
  • I like to relax by . . .
  • The best way to do . . .
  • My most embarrassing moment was when . . .
  • The most fun I ever had was when . . .
  • When I grow up, I want to be . . .
  • What really puzzles me is . . .
  • The most amazing bargain I ever found was . . .
  • Those annoying things kids do and what they mean
  • My shameless self-promotion
  • The thing about getting older is . . .

Important lessons for your children: Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can

By Becky Lyn Rickman, Managing Editor

Originally published on FamilyShare.com.
"Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can." — Arthur Ashe

The great Arthur Ashe said so much in these few words. There are huge lessons in them that we would be wise to teach our children. It is so easy for children to become overwhelmed—keeping up with studies, extracurriculars, chores, finding and growing talents, following their dreams through the day-to-day struggles, living in circumstances like poverty or bad neighborhoods.

We can help our children cope with their challenges by teaching them these lessons.

Start where you are. It doesn't matter what your circumstances are. All it takes is committing to that first step. If your children dream of becoming astronauts, encourage them to read books on the subject. Buy them model rockets or give them old egg cartons and glue and have them build their own. Let them know the stamina and strength required and set up a circuit training course for them to run around the outside of the house. Lie on a blanket under the stars with them and talk about the worlds there are out there to explore.

Whatever your children dream of becoming, every worthy goal begins with a single step. Let them know that they can carry out their dreams by beginning where they are and that, if necessary, they can do it by baby steps.

Use what you have. You don't have to have a state-of-the-art life to make your dreams come true. Sometimes people get so caught up in the things they "need" to make their dreams happen that they lose sight of the dreams themselves. Surrounding your children with the latest and greatest doesn't give them talent. If all they have is desire and drive, teach them to use those things. Teach them they have the power to make things happen. Show them how to improvise. If you are making pancakes and don't have baking powder, show them how to substitute. If you don't know how to substitute, look it up. If you need to unscrew something and don't have a screwdriver, use a butter knife. Teach your children not to give up on a task simply because they don't have the tools. Teach them to make the tools.

This concept also applies to less tangible challenges. If your children lack the mental or physical ability to do something, encourage them to follow their dreams anyway. History is full of folks who overcame insurmountable odds to make things happen: Helen Keller, blind and deaf; George Washington Carver, born into slavery; Nick Vujicic, born without limbs; John Nash who suffered from schizophrenia. Tell your children "they can" and give them support, not excuses. In the words of Nick Vujicic, "No arms, no legs, no worries." Share examples like these with your children to help them learn to use what they have and not lament what they don't have.

Do what you can. Learn never to accept your children's cries of "I can't do it." Come back with, "Yes, you can! I believe in you." There is no limit to what the human spirit can accomplish. Teach your children that and help them to actually believe it. This will open endless doors for them. Teach them that they can accomplish anything they put their minds and hearts to. Adopt the phrase, "Just do it." No excuses.

Another good concept that goes hand-in-hand with this one is that God reaches our reaching. If we do all we can do to accomplish a worthy goal, God will step in and help us along.

While this doesn't mean that there isn't a time to step back, take a break, and evaluate your work, it does mean you should do all that you can to make things happen for you. Teaching your children to start where they are, use what they have and do what they can will help them overcome their circumstances and dream big. Show them by example and express to them in words that there is no limit to what they can accomplish if they put in the work and effort. 


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